Happy Birthday Carson Hope Harred
Dear Carson Hope,
It’s your first birthday today. That’s why we all stood around your crib singing at you when you first woke up this morning. I hope you enjoyed it. We sure did.
Parents aren’t supposed to compare their children. It’s impolite and possibly damaging, but it’s also inevitable. We humans are sorting machines, and our brains demand that we tick off a list of what a thing is and isn’t when we encounter something new.
And you are new. Absolutely, wonderfully new.
And different from your sister. Where’s she’s obstinate, you are amenable. Where she’s even tempered and only rarely plussed, you’re all smiles and joy and sunshine until we cross you, and then you rage against us with all the babbling fury of a baby King Lear.
Just remember that even if we compare you, we don’t define you. You are your own person. You decide who you will be.
Forgive me one more comparison. Your sister reminds me of your mother, which is wonderful because I love your mother more than anything, but you remind me of me. I’m so incredibly proud of that, but it scares me because (just between us) I just barely know what to do with myself.
So for your birthday, I’ll give you this gift: I’ll remember all the things I learn in the years I’m rearing you, and I’ll keep in mind all of the things I did in the years before we had you, and I’ll tell you about them when the time comes. Not all at once, but in little quiet nudges of encouragement and warning.
And with all of that, and a little help from your mom, then maybe you can be the better version of me, but more importantly, you will always be the best version of you.
Love,
Dad
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